Lionlessart

My husband passed away this weekend. It came as a Shock when it happened and I'm honestly still kind of in shock. He had been sick, but none of us- not even him, I don’t think- realized just how bad it was. He was ok until he very suddenly wasn’t. I miss him so much already and it’s only been a few days. I keep thinking about all the things we’ll never get to do. We’d been together a long time but we haven’t even been married a year yet. I know Im lucky I got the time I have with him, and that I have family to support me, but that doesn’t make it hurt less. So yeah. I’ll probably actually draw

I haven't updated in a while, sorry about that. I've been busy and still kind of recovering from my total mental collapse. We finally figured out what was going on. My psychiatrist put me on 3 antidepressants -Which should NEVER happen by the way, if your antidepressant isn't working they are supposed to put you on a different one, not just add more and hope it works out, and they do that for a reason because- it caused me to have what's known as serotonin storm, which among causing a majority of my symptoms (confusion, agitation/restlessness, twitching/shivering, etc)and if left untreated, is DEADLY. So yeah. I went off all my meds while visiting family for a month and saw RAPID improvement. I normally wouldn't share this but I feel it's important because others might not be aware, especially with how mental health is often overlooked. Don't make my mistakes and assume your doctors know what they're doing, take an active role in your mental health. Also seek help early! By the time

So, I've been hesitant to talk about this but I feel it's important to bring up where I've been. For about a month now I've been in and out of mental hospitals. I kind of talked with my family about my identity and in so doing ended up having a big fight and a total mental breakdown. Even though I've been distant from them, my family means a lot to me, so when one side of my family was less than supportive it really broke me down. The other half of my family has tried to help as best they could and have been more than supportive of me, as has my SO, which made me want to get help. After weeks in-patient therapy, various treatments and new medications, we've finally gotten somewhere that seems to be working. I kind of feel like a failure to admit all this. That I needed so much help and that my mental problems were so serious. Up until this breakdown, I felt like I could manage with minimal intervention, or that it was a small problem and that feeling incapacitated by my mental state